Sunday, May 19, 2024

Do Distance Relationships Work? How Can You Make it Work?

I have had a long-distance relationships for almost two years now. At the end of this month, I’ll be moving in with her, closing the three-hundred-mile gap between us to zero. I can’t wait.

Here’s how we did it, in no particular order:

Be in each other’s presence as often as possible:

For us, that was an average of once a month for a weekend. That’s rough, but better than nothing. I had many different coping mechanisms for this, and not all of them were healthy. A lot of self-reflection and incredible patience from Michelle got me over the hump.

Sex Toys:

Long-distance relationships can certainly benefit from the use of sex toys, adding an extra layer of intimacy and connection despite the physical distance. It’s important to note that the use of sex toys should always be consensual and mutually agreed upon. Open communication about desires, boundaries, and comfort levels is crucial in integrating sex toys into a long-distance relationship successfully. Ultimately, the goal is to enhance intimacy and pleasure, contributing to the overall satisfaction of both partners.

Face time:

If you can’t be with each other, see each other. The webcam is a wonderful thing, use it. Google Hangouts, Skype, whatever. Being able to share a smile, a goofy wink, blow kisses, or just stare into each other’s eyes can not be understated.

Phone time:

If you can’t be with each other or see each other, talk. As often as possible. Just hearing the other person’s voice can do wonderful things to your psyche. Michelle and I would read Quora’s answers to each other.


You’re going to need a lot of this, and it will have to go both ways. I lack patience. This tended to make things more difficult than they needed to be. Don’t be me.


Man, this long-distance relationship stuff is tough, isn’t it? Always moping around, trying to “find the time” to get your stuff done and still spend some quality “cam time” together. All the stress, all the pressure. You do realize it’s tough on your significant other too, right? Right? Sometimes, you just need to shut up and let your loved ones vent their frustrations. Don’t judge. Please don’t make it personal. Just listen and understand.

Don’t turn off your emotions:

I did this. It was one of my coping mechanisms and it hurt Michelle and stunted my emotional well-being. It sure seemed easier to shut down and not pine and mope and miss Michelle, but it’s not. Don’t do it.


Hey, look, something else I struggled with. I had a thirteen-year relationship with an alcoholic before Michelle, and quite honestly, I think I forgot how to communicate in a healthy relationship. Don’t be me. Keep those lines of communication open and express yourself and your feelings.

Love, unconditionally:

Easy to say, harder to do. Relationships can be hard enough, but long-distance relationships are even harder. Don’t muck it up with a bunch of ifs ands or buts. Just love. That’s why you’re here in the first place.

Play fun games:

Something that could add some spice and excitement to your LDR is your smartphone. Take pictures of places you go and things you see and send them with a cute note, like “Wish you were here.” Sending revealing and provocative texts and photographs can also keep things fun and create anticipation rather than deflation. Create phone traditions like “high point/low point” to recap your week or what’s going on with your day so you can each share your best/worst moments and sort/laugh through them.

Never forget the element of surprise:

Sending flowers, mailing cookies, and making other cute gestures make up for some of your distance by still expressing your love in a way that shows you are always thinking of your partner and that your distance hasn’t removed a sense of mindfulness and consideration.

I can tell you without any hesitation that Michelle held this relationship together better than I did, and I’m thankful. I love her with all my heart and can’t imagine where we’d be if she had let my stubbornness, my temper, and many other flaws get in the way.

Do Long-Distance Relationships Are The Reason of Separation?

Long-distance relationships (LDRs) can pose unique challenges, but whether they lead to separation depends on various factors. While physical distance can create obstacles, many couples successfully navigate and strengthen their bonds despite being apart. Effective communication, trust, and shared goals play crucial roles in overcoming the challenges of a long-distance relationship.

The success of an LDR often depends on the commitment and effort both partners invest. Maintaining open communication through regular calls, video chats, and messages helps bridge the gap. Trust is fundamental, as partners need to feel secure and confident in each other’s commitment.

Having a plan for the future, such as a timeline for when the distance will be reduced, can provide hope and motivation. Additionally, finding ways to stay connected, like sharing experiences or surprises from afar, can keep the relationship vibrant.

However, challenges like loneliness, time zone differences, and limited physical contact can strain an LDR. Miscommunication may also arise due to the absence of non-verbal cues. Successful long-distance relationships require both partners to be proactive, understanding, and willing to address issues as they arise.

In conclusion, while long-distance relationships present challenges, they don’t necessarily lead to separation. With commitment, effective communication, and shared goals, couples can thrive and grow stronger, proving that love can endure even across miles

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